I think this e-mail sent to Mark Steyn at the Corner makes an important point:
Social conservatism is mostly defensive, protecting against others who are trying to use the government to control us according to their cultural opinions.
The reality is that in many cases the government must make a decision, like on which textbooks to buy and how to spend money. That means that cultural pacifism means letting the other side make the decision, and if they want, (ab)use the government to hurt us in the name of political correctness.